Fenrir by Skaldic Storm

Today's song I picked out of love for my boyfriend (February is the month of love after all!) and appreciation for how he has brought a number of unexpected happy moments to my life recently!

The song starts out with:

Son of Loki, spawn of night,

Brother of Hel, of serpent’s bite.

A wolf of shadow, wild and vast,

He breaks the chains the gods have cast.

It has captured my attention - both the musical beat and the words just call to me! Fenrir is the son of Loki. Fenrir is a wolf that breaks chains. Both are things that I am drawn too! Loki's mischief that only shows what was already problematic reminds me of myself and I resonate with the idea of being a "lone wolf."

Back to the song:

Raised in halls of shining gods,

Fed on fear, they whispered odd.

Each day he grew, his power untamed,

The wolf of doom, the beast unchained.

The song brings shivers to me because I was raised in an environment where I knew fear from those around me. I grew and learned how to "play" mind games better than those who used them... I grew and my mother was told to break my spirit to "tame" me. She didn't and my power was that which I was taught to fear: self-esteem was arrogance, prideful, that which was to be shunned because it was evil.

The song pulls me back with another stanza:

Fenrir, wolf of flame,

Born of hate, the end he’ll claim.

“Goð má reyna, fjǫtr má binda,”

But no god can end his flame.

My self-esteem has long been intertwined with hatred, but it is looking like my self-esteem is going to claim it's place in the end - and no arrogant human being who thinks that they can know my intentions without me telling them is going to end my self-esteem!

After a great interlude, we are back to lyrics!

Lædingr broke, Dromi torn,

Steel was nothing, rope forlorn.

So dwarves they forged a ribbon thin,

Of things that never have been.

Steel couldn't hold Fenrir - or rope! Dwarves made a ribbon out of the future... would it hold Fenrir?

He smelled their lies, demanded trust,

Týr gave his hand — the bite was just.

Blood ran red, the wolf’s grim laugh,

A god maimed, the price of wrath.

I smile because I can also "smell lies..." and when I say that lies smell fishy, I mean that literally. It smells of rotten fish corpses and makes me feel like biting the individual dumb enough to try it. If it wasn't so ... assault ... to bite liars, I probably would - and then laugh, grimly. Alas, I am not Fenrir and have to follow the rules...

Fenrir, wolf of flame,

Born of hate, the end he’ll claim.

“Goð má reyna, fjǫtr má binda,”

But no god can end his flame.

I have a flame within me. It may have been born from hatred, but it has yet to be ended...

Another short interlude... and then:

Sword in his jaws, his fury chained,

Silent he waits, his rage contained.

Until the sky and fire fall,

At Ragnarök he breaks it all.

This part brought goosebumps to me. I have held my own, but I have waited silently and kept my rage contained. The sky and fire is falling around me... and I feel like breaking it (whatever it is...) all!

Odin falls in Fenrir’s breath,

The king devoured, the wolf brings death.

Víðarr strikes, the jaws are torn,

The beast is slain — yet doom is born.

This part makes me sad though and I am brought back to wondering if my self-esteem is going to end up bringing death, pain, and suffering to those I love. Odin was like a father to Loki - or a grandfather to Fenrir (if I understand my Norse mythology correctly...). Is putting myself first some of the time going to only harm those I love and care for?

Fenrir, wolf of flame,

Born of hate, the end he’ll claim.

“Goð má reyna, fjǫtr má binda,”

But no god can end his flame.

Fenrir was killed in the end, but it only brought more darkness...

Fenrir, fate is near,

The end of gods, the world in fear.

And this ends with exactly how I feel... my fate is near and that, despite my best efforts to be kind and loving, the world fears me.

This song brings me joy and sadness - all at once - and I love songs that can pull multiple emotions out of me. They feel so much more ... relatable ... since I seem to be incapable of only having a single, solitary feeling at any point in time!

What is one of your favorite songs by Skaldic Storm?