Shelter Life

Sheltered Life

I had a great life growing up. I had the best parents, eight siblings, and a great extended family. I always felt I was taken care of. I would never or ask for anything else. After my parents passed away, my brother's friend said to me, "Guess who is taking care of you now?” Then he pointed at me. I was offended, but yeah, at 35 years old, it was time to grow up.

I have my siblings, extended family, and an amazing husband. I couldn't ask for anything better. I wished my parents were still here, but happy they are together.

In my life, I had some close calls, which is why I was so overprotected. When I was a baby, I got a staph infection. When I was sixteen, I almost drowned in a white-water rafting trip. When I was twenty, I was in a bad car accident, which almost did me in. If it wasn't for my family and friends, I probably wouldn't have survived.

I took care of my mom after my father passed away. The truth is I would do it again. My husband and my old supervisor take care of me. My husband makes sure I'm safe. My old supervisor calls and checks in on me.

I never understood what a sheltered life meant until I saw someone else’s way of life. I had this friend who came over. She had carried some bags with her. The bags seemed to contain everything she owned. She carried her clothes, her journals, her pillow, a blanket, and gadgets, literally, everything. When I asked why she brought all this she responded, “I need it all to stay in my comfort zone.” She was organizing her belongings as she told me about her parents and their overprotection. I explained to her how I grew up. She hated it but she made it difficult and painful for her parents. They admitted her into the hospital for help.

I told her my parents were overprotective, too, but that's love. You never know what people are going through. Even if you are going through it, it's not always the same for everyone. It's always in the way to handle it. I always offer suggestions but never say "I know how you feel." My parents were there for me. I still talk to them even though they're gone. Sometimes I look back and see how sheltered I was.

I lived at home until I was 33. I still had to abide by a curfew, check in with my parents. My siblings would say, “You're 33 years old, and they still make you do this?” My mom still did everything for me. She cooked, did my laundry, and she had to know what I was doing, and with whom. To make sure I was safe, they bought me a cell phone and put restrictions on me when they were out of town. I hated it back then. Now, at the age of 38, married. I see how protective I am over my farm animals. Being overprotective, or living a sheltered life, is not a bad thing. It means you were loved, and you learned from any mistakes. That's how you grew up.

My parents did their job. They raised nine children and put all of us through college. I remember one time, I called my older brother, and I said, “When will mom start treating me like an adult, my age?”

He laughed and said, "I'll let you know.'' I could tell we’d all experienced the same overprotection. You live and learn. Without that protection and sheltered life, some of life’s situations may have turned out differently.

It gave me a sense of direction, love, and making the right decisions. Without experiencing that, any of us would have grown up learning responsibility, and love.

I learned a lot from my parents and it was a great life because of my sheltered life. That is Love.

By Kelly Vedder