The Proposal

Elizabeth stepped out onto the ice of the frozen pond, tentatively at first, and then with more confidence. The pond stretched before her like a sheet of diamond glass. It was beautiful and peaceful - she had not been on the ice since she and Jacob had been married.

They used to skate together all the time. Their rhythm and relaxed movements so synchronized anyone would have thought they were professional ice skaters.

Elizabeth sighed deeply, taking in the cool breeze and acknowledging the barren trees that circled the outer border of the pond. The trees stood like entranced onlookers waving their hands in the wind.

This was where they’d met. He was tall, handsome, and had the kindest most intense eyes; eyes that saw her with love and compassion, eyes that that connected with her very soul.

He was everything she had ever wanted.

He cared about people, not because of what they could do for him - he felt every person should be given a chance.

Jacob carried a compassion within him that wasn’t practiced or fake. He not only garnered respect from those around him, but he gave it.

She had seen many of her friends coo and daydream over their boyfriends, he or she was hot or was full of adventure, but they never showed respect for each other. They would fight and curse each other the second they had a disagreement. They would purposely do things to hurt each other, break up and then merge back together like a river and a stream - only to separate once again.

She had never wanted that, she’d prayed for a relationship that was healing and kind.

That is what she had waited for, and that’s why she had taken time to work on her inner fears and pain before she tried to bring them into a relationship. She’d faced her fears and loved spending time with the person she was, before she even entertained looking for someone to love her.

So yes, she had found everything she wanted in Jacob and had believed that she was everything he wanted as well, until today; but doubts had been setting in over the past month. He’d been really busy with a project to help others who felt lost and without hope build their confidence and their lives.

She was so proud of him, but she missed him.

They barely had time to talk and connect when he came home. She felt like an afterthought. She knew she shouldn’t, but if she were honest with herself, she did.

She’d made dinner for them and took it to his office so they could spend some time with each other. When she got there, she saw him come out with Helen Wright.

Helen was a very attractive, very intelligent, very single, woman whose company was interested in contributing to Jacob’s project efforts. She could hear them discussing where to go for dinner. Jacob didn’t see Elizabeth and she didn’t want him to. She had turned to go back to her car dumping her romantic dinner basket in the back seat like old leftovers, and drove home.

She was angry at first - then sad. Elizabeth went to their bedroom closet and pulled out her old ice skates. She didn’t know why at the time, she just wanted to feel free and happy like she did when they would come to the frozen pond to skate years ago…

Elizabeth sped up suddenly feeling more confident in her skating ability, preparing to do a mid air spin. She jumped at the perfect moment - spun as if in slow motion, and landed on her feet perfectly. She had not done that move in years!

She smiled.

She loved flying across the ice at warp speed, feeling in control and vibrant; however, just as quickly as her smile appeared, it faded because Jacob wasn’t with her.

Suddenly, as if by divine intervention he was there smiling at her and clapping as he often did when she’d do anything that made her happy and feel free. He had on his skates and was gliding towards her.

It took her a moment to realize that it was really him and not her imagination. Her heart did a little skip like it used to whenever he came near her. Looking at the love in his eyes as he moved towards her, she knew she was being silly. Jacob was a part of her, and she – him. He would never do anything to hurt her intentionally. He never had.

She stopped skating and looked down, not quite knowing what to say to him.

She saw the little spray of ice as he used his toe pick to come to a stop in front of her.

He took her hands and gently brought one up to his lips for a gentle kiss. She didn’t look up, so he gently lifted her head from its drooping position.

“Hi.” He said looking at her waiting for eye contact.

“Hi.” She eventually said looking at him.

“What are you doing here?” She asked wondering how he’d found her. She hadn’t left a note when she left home.

“I could ask the same thing.” He said with a slight smile.

“But to answer your question, I dropped Helen off to a dinner meeting and came home to spend some time with you. The box you kept your skates in was on the bed and you were gone. I tried calling you, but you didn’t answer. I thought I’d try my luck and come here.”

He looked around at the scenery. No one was on the ice as it was starting to get dark.

“I guess I was right. You’re here… Why?”

“I just needed some time to think.”

“About what, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing Jacob.” She tried to pull her hands back.

“I just needed some time alone.”

“From me?”

“No.” she pulled away this time and started slowly skating.

He followed her.

“Elizabeth, I know we haven’t been able to spend much time together.”

She was skating one step ahead of him. He allowed her that space for a moment.

“I know we haven’t been able to talk as much. But when we married, we promised to always communicate with each other. It’s the lack of communication a lot of times that destroys a relationship.”

He caught up to her.

“You mean too much to me for that… What’s wrong?”

She was silent.

“Do you feel like I’m not there for you?” He took her hand. She slowed and stopped knowing he was right. They had promised to always talk to each other.

“It’s not that. I know you are there for me and I know how important this project is. I believe in it too Jacob. But…” She took a deep breath knowing they needed to talk about it.

“We always left time for each other. No matter how crazy work or family or anything else became, we always took time to check in mentally and emotionally with each other. When we don’t do that, it makes me feel…alone.”

He went to speak, but she continued gently asking with her eyes that he let her finish.

“I know that I am not alone. I know that you love me. But we need to give maintenance to our connection because there are so many things that we could place before it, and before you know it, we are so far apart that we don’t know how to come back together.”

“That is how I have been feeling. We both have jobs that require a lot of our time and we both work with helping others, and I love that. But we have to remember to help each other as well. It hurts when I feel like we have forgotten how to do that.”

“Don’t you think it hurts me too? I know our schedules have been off… mine even more so, but you have to know that even if I come in and you are sleeping, when I lay next to you I feel at home. I feel rejuvenated. I carry your love with me every day. How can I be disconnected from you when you are so much of who I am?”

He pulled her close to him. The cool winter breeze wrapped around them and his warmth made her feel safe and secure.

She looked into his eyes. His eyes showed the truth of his emotions as though she were reading a book of his soul.

“I know that you need me, I need you too. That is why I came home earlier today. When I didn’t see you, I didn’t know what to think. You didn’t pick up your phone.”

“I left it in the car. I didn’t want to talk. I thought I would come by your office this evening. I made us a dinner and I was going to bring it by but, you were leaving with Helen. You had been spending so much time with her on this project; I thought you already had dinner plans.”

He looked at her trying to see what she was saying.

“I know you didn’t think I was cheating on you?”

She looked a little guilty. She didn’t think that… but she was a little jealous if she were honest.

“No I didn’t think that. I just felt…”She tried looking for the right word.

“Insufficient.”

He pulled her into his arms.

“You could never be insufficient. You are everything to me. Don’t you know that?”

He pulled back to look at her. She shook her head yes. Knowing she was overreacting, she just missed him so much.

“I wasn’t leaving with Helen. I just dropped her off at the restaurant so she could meet with some other investors. I came home to be with you.” He softly rubbed his nose against hers.

“But it seemed as though my dinner date left me to perform in Ice-Capades.” He teased her to lighten the mood. She gently hit his shoulder.

He took her hand then and started to lead her over the ice.

“You remember when we would come here almost every week when we were dating?”

They were skating side by side.

She could feel them gliding over the ice in unison just like they used to; his arm around her waist and hers around his.

“I always looked at the ice when were skating - looking for weak spots; ice on pond’s are unpredictable. Some areas are strong and stable and make you feel safe, and some spots are weaker. You have to watch for the weak spots. The weak spots look strong, but too much pressure could cause the ice to crack, and that could mean trouble.”

They skated in synchronized rhythm around the pond, him holding her securely to him. She knew he did that to brace her if she were to miss a step and fall. She’d always loved feeling that protection when they skated.

“Marriage is the same way.” He continued.

“You have to watch out for the weak spots. We have to both watch and look out for the danger of cracks because what we have is too important to place in danger, it is too important to allow us to fall into a frozen void.” He looked deeply into her eyes.

“I love you so much.”

“I love you too Jacob.” He smiled at that.

“I propose we always choose to communicate, and look out for the cracks together, so we stay on the solid ice.” He stopped and faced her.

“I plan on skating with you for a long time.” He pulled her to him.

“Do you accept my proposal?”

She answered him and smiled just before she melted into his arms and their lips touched with all the love and passion that they had the day of the first proposal that he’d made two years ago.

She’d given him the same answer then…

“Yes.”