Coming Out Never Ends

To me, life is everything we choose to make of it. We wake up and most days we have a plan. And on those days that are unplanned we wing it, because I mean, what else are we supposed to do other than keep on moving. We often forget that we hold the key to our happiness. We often forget that whether the sun shines or not there will still be evil out in the world. Acceptance shouldn't be as hard as most people make it. Just be a conscious, loving, and caring human, right?

Coming out is known to be one of the most difficult things for a human to have to do. What if I told you as a lesbian I pretty much come out to the world and those around me almost weekly. It sound's crazy doesn't it, but it is very much true. Whether it be to a stranger, or to a friend you haven't seen in years, the news ultimately subconsciously comes to surface. I mean, it isn't as if we introduce ourselves and say, "Hi, my name is Charlie and I am a lesbian…" But in my case I will almost always mention my fiancé while conversing, it is just how the subconscious works, especially if you are around your partner more times than not. Then you'll either get the, "normal" response, or the weird and awkward, "oh okay."

Unlike many, coming out wasn't hard for me. I started to realize I was different around 8 years old. Which I am pretty sure was the first time I kissed a girl under the seats at church(we were coloring I think, I don't remember). But still, I was too young to even understand much. As I grew older and into junior high school I had a bunch of little boyfriends, and a bunch of girl crushes. High school was the same, except I had actually been hooking up with girls by that point.

The school knew who I was. I was open with myself, and I wasn't scared to be myself. Many of my peers would approach me in silence and hand me a note asking for help on how to come out. People felt comfortable around me and it is exactly what helped me continue on feeling confident and secure with who I was.

We didn't choose this lifestyle…

It wasn't until after high school where I just showed up to my house with a girlfriend and that was that. I didn't explain anything, no big announcement, nothing. Most of my family had accepted me, others took about a few years to really understand and accept. It is not easy one bit, and for us to have to come out multiple times over and over again to the world is sad. I'd love to wake up one day and have a normal conversation, about my normal life with my fiancé who is a woman. We didn't choose this lifestyle.

Although, my coming out story didn't have as much heart break as most, it is still hard to live everyday trying to be yourself and love who ever you choose while trying to match society's point of view on what, "normal" really is. I'll take all the dirty looks just so I can continuously hold my love's hand any chance I get, or sneak a kiss on the cheek. My heart aches for those who aren't there yet, and I just want to say I have always, and will always be an ear to anyone struggling with coming out and finding their peace.

Be so unapologetically different and never look back!

Your life is what you make of it, not what any one else makes of it. Your happiness is precious and your smile is full of magic. We must not forget that we are worth everything, and we are every bit of human as the next. So cheers to the never ending coming out story, cheers to real, and cheers to finally feeling comfortable to share our true selves with a world who will never understand, while holding our head up high telling our stories over and over again to help give just enough magic and strength to the next person who isn't strong enough to do the same. Love is and always will be Love.

Original story written on Medium.com