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The Day I Learned to Stay

My love story

By EpaphrasPublished 4 days ago 1 min read

The Day I Learned to Stay
Photo by Oleg Illarionov on Unsplash

For a long time, I treated myself like someone temporary.

Someone I could abandon when things got hard.

I chased approval, borrowed validation, and measured my worth by how well I was loved by others.

When love left, I blamed myself.

When I failed, I became my own harshest judge.

I spoke to myself in a language I would never use on someone I cared about.

One day, I grew tired—not of life, but of running from myself.

I sat with my reflection and noticed the tired eyes, the quiet strength in them, the stories they held. I realized I had survived things I once thought would break me. Not perfectly. Not gracefully. But honestly.

So I made a small promise: *I would stay.*

I stayed when I made mistakes.

I stayed when I felt unlovable.

I stayed when healing felt slow and lonely.

I began to listen to myself instead of silencing my needs. I rested without guilt. I forgave without keeping score. I learned that self-love wasn’t loud or glamorous—it was patient. It was choosing kindness when criticism felt easier.

Slowly, I stopped asking, *“Am I enough?”*

And started saying, *“I am here.”*

And that changed everything.

Loving myself didn’t mean I no longer needed others. It meant I no longer disappeared for them. I learned that the truest love is not the one that rescues you—but the one that teaches you how to hold yourself with care.

Now, when the world is unkind, I am gentle with myself.

When I fall short, I reach inward instead of away.

This is my love story.

Not dramatic. Not perfect.

But steady.

I learned to stay. 💛

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  • Tori4 days ago

    A wise 6'4 drag queen summed this lesson up well: "If you can't love your self, how the hell are you going to love somebody else?" Jokes aside, it's something so many struggle with. But, isn't it liberating when you finally beat your inner critic and love yourself? :) Kudos.

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