Miscellaneous Tasks Can Take Over Your Life

It is a sunny day in mid-June. That doesn’t matter. I’m just using it as an example. I probably would have used many of the same examples if it were two weeks before Christmas or the last day of August.

I am sitting in my living room/dining room and I’m looking around. The room is clean by ordinary standards, meaning that there is very little clutter. I am noticing the following:

• There is a strand of wicker poking out from behind the chair in front of me.

• The dog’s nose art is decorating the lower half of the bay window.

• The guitar that nobody plays has a broken string. (I keep the guitar for decoration because I like it.)

• There is a stack of games and a bag of kazoos next to the wine rack. It has been there since Christmas. We played a few of the games and put them right back where they don’t belong.

• The fiesta balloon that someone brought over on Cinco de Mayo is still drifting in front of the window.

• The gingerbread house that we neglected to assemble before Christmas is still under the side table.

• The baseboards are really dusty.

This list is made up of minor housekeeping issues that I can see from my exact location on the loveseat. If I were to move to any other perch in the house, I would easily be able to make another list. The point is that there is always something to do. There will always be a new cobweb or dust bunny forming somewhere.

This morning I woke up bright and early armed, as usual, with a to-do list and an approximate schedule. By my optimistic reckoning, I would be done with my morning routine and my daily chores by 11:30. I had planned to go to Walmart for Neem oil because yesterday I noticed that my tomato leaves are under siege from aphids and whatever those little brown specks are. But before I could get to Walmart, I had to make an emergency run to get my husband’s newly broken eyeglasses fixed. That done, I went to Walmart and then Home Depot because Walmart was out of Neem oil. I also needed to do prep work for dinner, finish the laundry that I started yesterday, make two doctor’s appointments, and vacuum the floors (because Tuesday is supposed to be floor day). Somewhere in there I let the dog out no less than three times, engaged in two timely text exchanges, fielded a phone call, and set up a new recycling station for filmy plastics. At 1:30 I decided that my outdoor work would wait until after dinner because, as a writer, my focus should be writing and not perpetual housekeeping.

I retired from teaching a few years ago with the crazy idea that it would be easy to work from home as a writer AND keep up with the housework. I feel like I spend way more time on “housework” than I did when I was commuting to a job. While I can’t say that my house is a mess, I never feel caught up.

What, to me, is housework?

• cleaning the kitchen

• cleaning the bathrooms

• vacuuming

• laundry

• grocery shopping

• running errands

• meal prep

• cooking

• cleaning up after dinner

• collecting the garbage and recycling and bringing it to the curb

• sorting through the mail and following up as needed

• making and keeping appointments

• garden care, which has its own list

• taking care of the pool

• doing anything I didn’t list that includes non-recreational or writing activities

• keeping up with the myriad of miscellaneous tasks that started this tirade to begin with

When I think of all the actions that go into keeping the household going, it’s a wonder that anyone has time for a job. Yet, we all muddle though.

Here’s what I’m learning.

1. I need to put myself first. I need to decide that writing and reading are my priorities and require a block of time every day.

2. Everything else gets prioritized for the remaining portion of time. So if I decide that I’m going to write from 1:00 to 4:00, then my any chores or errands that aren’t done my 1:00 aren’t going to get done that day.

3. I deserve an end to my work day. If I have been working since 7:45 a.m. and I decide that I want to play games on my computer for an hour before I cook dinner, then I have declared and should stick to that quitting time.

4. Life is more than a series of jobs. Being at home should not mean a constant parade of cleaning, cooking, and meeting the demands of others. These things must be done, but there has to be significant time for walking in the woods, watching the sunset, or reading a novel on a float in the pool that you have been so diligently tending. It’s better to order pizza while finger painting with your kids than to produce the perfect meal while they watch cartoons.

It all comes down to taking control. The way to keep miscellaneous tasks from taking over your life is to decide what’s important and do what you can in the time you’ve allotted. You get to direct your life, not the dust bunnies and cobwebs.