Despair

I don’t feel fine,

I want to scream to the starry sky

Till my throat dries

And the skin around my eyes rips and dies

I don’t feel okay,

I am afraid,

My body quakes,

My body shakes,

A stake in my throat,

It makes me choke,

I can’t breathe,

I don’t know why I’m scared,

But I can’t bear it,

My heart wants to leave,

Put the gun to my head, but my mind says, don't you dare

I said this isn't fucking fair

Down the barrel, I stare

Why do I care

When there's so much despair

Parasites in my mind are eating at my eyes, so I can't see the light

They don't see the fight when I say I'm alright

I grab the knife, but this sickness doesn't bleed out

So outright

I cry out

An outcry

But it's as if I never made a sound

In my thoughts, I drown

Getting pulled deeper into the ground

As I reach out

But there's no one around

Rip out my hair

It's in the air

So much despair

I grasp and thrash

In vain

The world is hurting me

So bad

Taking me

So fast

Death is waiting

The devil is baiting

My mind is debating

Everyday

I am fading

There's no sedating

This feeling

Of despair

Death won't compare

Break every mirror

I don't want to see what's there

Because when I stare

There's so much despair