You're (Not) Here

Your body’s present

But you, yourself aren’t there

You may move or stay frozen

You may speak or stay silent

Your absence may be recognized or go unnoticed

It doesn’t matter

No matter what happens around you, you can never fully experience it

Anything that happens to you, anything that happens around you

You’re not there for it

In good times you might feel ready to cry

Your body remains still, but your heart beats faster and faster

Something in you screams, begs to stop and to be heard

And yet nothing changes

Because in that time of you yelling no sound has come out

Your body’s nothing more than a vessel, holding you captive

Trapping you in a limbo that seems to last forever

And even when it ends, it’s never truly over

Since you know this isn’t the first time you’ve felt trapped like this

And you wonder how many times it can happen until you finally feel free