Satire
Horoscopes for November
With today’s busy lifestyle and fast paced need for short form information, please allow me to provide you with your weekly horoscope. Let me gaze into my crystal ball, consult my Tarot Cards, and wave incense in the general direction of whichever way is north
By Alan Walker2 years ago in Humor
“Asteroid City”: Wes Anderson at his Wessiest
There’s been a brand of cinematic work that’s taken off in recent years, and the style is proving divisive for many viewers. They’re the films that don’t intend to tell cohesive narratives. They’re the films that seem as though they’re more intent on confusing audiences— or at least causing them to think a little too deeply for their comfort — than they are on entertaining them.
By Ben Ulansey2 years ago in Humor
How South Park Used ChatGPT to Help Write an Episode. Content Warning.
South Park is a show like no other. Where so many shows and cartoons seem almost to exist outside of time, South Park stays rooted in the moment. That’s not to say, of course, that the children have actually aged. Apart from graduating from third to fourth grade, they’ve remained 10-year-olds as they’ve confronted everything from climate change to religion, to politics, to a giant mechanized Barbara Streisand.
By Ben Ulansey2 years ago in Humor
South Park: The Most Important Satire Ever Made
Sometimes South Park can get a bad rap. With some of the jokes told in its 26 year run, it's not difficult to see why. South Park is both ruthless and persevering. With 326 episodes in its catalogue, there are few issues the long-running satire has failed to explore - and comprehensively.
By Ben Ulansey2 years ago in Humor
Castle Chicanery II
MERCANTILE & TRADE: Caravan Leader Fired: Turb N. Guye, long time caravan leader for Lord Androlian - court jester - was terminated yesterday [from his position, not from his life, although the vote was close]. Per reliable accounts it seems Caravanser Guye has on several occasions delivered property and goods to the wrong coordinates, thus causing massive problems with proper distribution of resources and revenue. This firing took place amidst allegations of possible animal abuse as Turb N. Guye was also accused of humping the camels.
By Andrew C McDonald2 years ago in Humor
Nice Guys Finish Fifth, Sixth, and Seventh in Local Marathon
Each year since the inception of the local marathon nice guys, the brothers Tod and Ted Stephens, along with friend Jim Thorne, had finished last. Most had speculated that this year would be no different. Today, the Stephens brothers and Mr. Thorne proved the haters and doubters wrong, finishing fifth, sixth, and seventh respectively. A visibly tired, heavily sweat pit stained, but still smiling Ted Stephens said the following about the nice guy trios historic result. "I am just so gosh darned pleased with my performance, and especially that of my brother Tod and old college roomie Jim. With this finish under my belt maybe Cherry (Tims) will finally go on an actual date with me and agree to that candlelight dinner at Chez Rouzeau I have been asking her about for years. Assuming she says yes, I might be given the opportunity to patiently lay the groundwork for a long term relationship by listening intently and responding with genuine warmth and caring as she talks about the horrible day she had at the shoe factory where she works. This would be in contrast to our other 'dates' which have mostly been us meeting at the local Denny's and splitting a Moons over My Hammy for breakfast, as I listen intently and respond with genuine warmth and caring as she talks about the terrible day she had at the shoe factory. Those are really a waste of mine and her time. Although, she really does need a good shoulder to cry on, and, I am a really good listener. I guess it's not so bad. Eventually she will have to tire of empty passionate sex with various members of the high school football team. I can give her so much more than that. Except for the sex part, I can only handle so much of that until I get really tired and sleepy."
By Everyday Junglist2 years ago in Humor
Bloody Pencilvanian-Penlander War Continues With No End In Sight
The ink stains of the dead Penlanders are as fresh as the horror and dismay over the fates of the many Pencilvanians erased from the front lines. This centuries old conflict shows no signs of abating as fighting renewed again yesterday at the contested border between the two warring nation states. Hardest hit by loss were the famed Penlander fountaineers claiming some 500 dead in the first five minutes of fighting alone. They stormed the Pencilvanian front lines early and with numbers but ran head first into a hail of graphite re-enforced artillery shells lobbed from deep behind enemy lines. The battle tested #2 company of the Pencilvanian army then counter attacked with a neat pincer move attempting to sever the head of the Penlander BiC brigade, so named for its legendary leader General Brad (ironside) Cotton. General Cotton called for a counter-attack but the Pencilvanians gelled as a unit, hardened their lines with their mechanicalized troops, and repulsed the counter easily with a simple brush stroke. In a last ditch maneuver to salvage something from the horrendous string of losses the General fielded razor company and the 101st lighter brigade consisting of several thousand battle tested Penlander shock troopers. They attacked in ball point formation exploiting a small crack in the Pencilvanian lines. At the point of impact ink and black carbon flew in all directions as the ancient enemies met in bloody tip to tip fighting. This reporter will never forget the horror of that sight and prays for a swift end to this seemingly never ending war.
By Everyday Junglist2 years ago in Humor
