humanity
Advocates, icons, influencers, and more. All about humanity.
Competitive Pain
Pain. Whether it’s emotional, mental or physical, pain has the ability to take over our entire existence. As one of the millions of people who suffer from chronic pain and a slew of other health issues I can tell you this: pain should never be a competition. It should be validated for the individual. But this is not the case. I’ve spent so much time reading comments on my social media from people who also struggle with their own health issues and pain. Instead of feeling validated from the pain I’ve expressed in a post, I am flooded with people talking about their own pain and how their own illnesses affect them. Suddenly my words are used to build others' cases and it becomes an unintentional competition. Just because we have different ailments doesn’t mean our pain is that much different — and no one will ever truly know or understand the pain one suffers. All you can do is validate it by saying, “I’m so sorry you are experiencing this. I am thinking of you.” In that comment I am not taking away from the pain the individual expressed and I’m not competing by stating all of my own pain issues that end up making the person feel unheard and frustrated. It isn’t a competition! I don’t need to hear all about your constant pains and ailments when I am already attempting to handle my own heaviness. When someone starts listing all the pain and things they can’t to as a response to a post I become frustrated. The point of my post was never to feel like my pain is "nothing compared to what others feel," but that’s what happens. I understand people think if they relate to others by listing everything they suffer with themselves as a way to try to make me or others “not feel alone,” but it does exactly the opposite. It makes me feel like I will never be sick enough for the appropriate validation. It makes me feel like their pain is more important than my own. It makes me feel like they don’t understand despite how they say they do, because they are so wrapped up in their own type of pain. But pain is subjective. It manifests in too many ways to know the exact form of it. To me, pain is pain. And I will always validate it when someone expresses it to me by never bringing my own issues up. I simply accept their pain and offer comforting words. There’s no need for me to go into depth about all the pain I am currently enduring because that person can only handle their own pain in the moment and it’s not fair of me to put it onto them. I never want to make people feel like they haven’t been heard. That’s one of the worst feelings, and it happens way too often in this life full of chronic illness and chronic pain. We are often overlooked in the medical field, and doctors can treat us with such disrespect it’s appalling. Of course, these are my personal experiences, but I know I’m not alone.
By Lauren Berichon8 years ago in Longevity
Millennial with Invisible Illness
When you turn 21, your expectation is to get your "adult ID" and go to clubs and bars with your friends, drink on a Thursday even if you have to wake up at 5 AM the next day for work. Unfortunately, my reality, my 21st birthday, I was always exhausted, I fell asleep almost everywhere, my only dates were with doctors and the only mood modifying substance was the cocktail of 21 pills I was taking daily.
By Yessenia Ivone8 years ago in Longevity
Surviving Surviving
No one taught me how to be handicapped. How am I supposed to be something I was never taught to see? When I was a girl eating bologna sandwiches and watching the history channel instead of cartoons on Saturday mornings with my father, he told me I could be and do anything — well, except be a surgeon or fly a plane, as if those could ever be my only two limitations. I was raised to be and feel normal and think my handicap was just part of normal life, that there was no difference between me and someone who is not visually impaired. And that is one hell of a way to be. It really is. But my desire to be normal drove me to being embarrassed and even ashamed of my handicap to the point I would go to great lengths to hide it. The last thing you would ever hear me say was “I can’t see it.” No one showed me how to own it. No one understood the pain, anger, trauma, and isolation I feel about it. No one gets what it was like being a survivor. And survivor is such a bullshit term too for someone who still feels like a victim.
By Queen James8 years ago in Longevity
Disabily: Disabled or Differently Abled
Handicapped, disabled, special, and the dreaded "r" word. Those are all terms that are often synonymous with people who have different needs. The world has been changing so much in the last few decades and the LGBTQ community has been becoming more accepted and pride has blossomed. Awesome!
By Rachel Bonyai8 years ago in Longevity
Do Autistics Really Have No Empathy?
Since I started researching my symptoms I've come across article after article stating that autistic people cannot feel empathy. One thing I've noticed is that all of these articles are written by people who do not have autism. Knowing that I have a great deal of empathy, I started asking other autistic people what their experience with empathy is. The overwhelming response has been that autism actually increases empathy to a point far greater than the empathy experienced by your average individual. The problem is that the brains of people without autism do not function in this way so it is impossible for them to understand fully. Communication issues also make it difficult for autistic people to explain the experience fully. I will try my best to explain how empathy affects me and hopefully this will help others to understand better.
By Aspie Insider8 years ago in Longevity
Invisible Illnesses
96% of people living with chronic conditions have invisible illnesses and chances are you know at least one of them, but do you know exactly what their struggles are? Have you ever wanted to know more about their situation but don't know how to approach them? Here is a list I have compiled of things that many of us living with an invisible illness want you to know.
By Leslie Montaño8 years ago in Longevity
How the Opioid Epidemic Effects People with Chronic Illness
I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in May of 2017. Yes it is still new, I know I have not had it as long as others have. That does not make my pain any less real. I feel pain consistently every single day. It is very unfortunate that I have to consider this “my new normal.”
By Natalie Chatman8 years ago in Longevity
The Reality of Life
This might sound crazy to some, but my biggest fear as a human being, other than losing family, is the future of our species. As a fellow human, I am connected to all of the people on this planet. Due to that, I am truly worried about the way we treat our home. I have seen the movie Wall-E and the concept is pretty accurate. One day Earth will be covered in trash and we are going to be faced with a choice. The human race will either die, or colonize another planet.
By Luke S. Thompson8 years ago in Longevity
Starting Points and Self Perception
There will be several points in your life where you will ask, “Who am I?” Each point may be at a pivotal moment in your life ranging from your sexuality, your career plans, or even a change in your lifestyle; all of these moments come with difficult decisions that you will have to make in order to improve your life.
By Braiden Pergis8 years ago in Longevity
