Sky's the Limit

Early morning routines so mundane. Looking out the grimy window covered with metal bars. Confined, controlled, and seeking freedom. No clarity on what the future holds but one thing for certain, I wanted to come out of my comfort zone. Home is all I know, and home stunts your growth. Weeeeeee hours of the morning something was being created in my mind. So imaginative, vivid dreams, and optimism beyond belief. Pulled the suitcase out, took a bath with my favorite suds, and scheduled a cab for pick up. My partner in life, Baby Girl, was down for the adventure of course.

Depression succumbed my life. Can you imagine the life you wanted for yourself was not what God had planned for you? Hebrews 11:6 "And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him." That was the reason for the flight departure. I decided to release control and let Jesus take the wheel, and here we are at the airport.

Traveling feeds our heart and soul. In this chapter we call it “One Way”! Madelyn was rapidly consuming chocolate pop tarts, jelly filled donuts, and an abundance of apple juice. Time was ticking at the gate for the flight and they delayed it multiple times, anxiety was really getting to me. Once the gate opened we skipped the whole line, ran to the front, and entered the tunnel to the unknown. Finally, we entered our seats, hours after arriving at the airport. Gazing out the window at the thick white clouds and light blue skies.

Bright and fluorescent the sun was beaming through the glass. The tires were being released from the bottom of the plane vibrating the ish out of the take off process. While I’m losing my marbles, a meditation video comes on the screen in the monitor in front of me. Inhale… exhale… in repetition. Right on time, the feeling at that specific time was overwhelming. Ok, Jet Blue, I love that for us frequent flyers. All I could feel was, let’s get ready for this new chapter.

Slowly we were elevating, Madelyn was indulging in “Hotel Transylvania” and I began to write. Eventually she fell asleep, which I was grateful because the acceleration did not sit well with me. Before deciding to take this leap, I was in need of deep mental healing. Addictions and not substance abuse, but my codependency was really damaging my mind and body. Being dependent on my family kept me broke and sick. Ultimately they couldn’t take me to the heights I desired to fulfill my life. Whatever God had on my life, I wouldn’t be able to fulfil the longer I held on. Psalm 138:8 (ESV) says: “The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever. Do not forsake the work of your hands.” God has a plan.

Throughout this flight I had thoughts of wanting to feel loved. God however, is making this season about “Self Love”, and this journey I have been on for the past five years. The period of isolation unknowingly transformed me into a different woman. The old me was falling away rapidly and my old life was diminishing before my eyes. What an ego death. During April I made the final judgement call. The plethora of emotions was undesirable. Heights in the sky, this was my definition of therapy. What peace and calm this brings to my inner being. No wonder we pay for first class, purchase champagne, an exotic meal. Meditation and contemplation, reclined plush seats, and my favorite R&B music. Madelyn and I are living our best lives. What is life without risk? To experience these moments is not about the cost, but more about the bliss. Damn near priceless.

I am pretty proud of myself for flowing with the universe and taking action on the things that really make me feel whole, and not just chasing the bag. Failure does not frighten me and abundance is my birth right. Your success is your birthright. I challenge you to submit your best literature to your favorite publisher, fly to a new country, pour into your own cup. It feels so good internally, invigorating, and amazing, to sit in this feeling during the flight with my favorite girl. Unconditional love is what its' all about at the end of the day. Enjoying this flight is much deeper than a trip across the continent, this is healing in an unconventional way.