The Love I Was Searching For Was Always Within Me

I used to believe that love—the kind that makes life feel complete—could only come from others.

I spent years mesmerized by the idea of being loved, seeking it in friends, family, and everyone around me. I thought that if I had enough people by my side, I would automatically feel whole.

I didn’t know the concept of self-love existed. To me, it seemed impossible: how could I love myself when I didn’t even know what that meant? I believed my happiness depended entirely on others, and that my worth was measured by how much love I received from them.

But over time, I realized something profound: the love I was searching for outwardly was quietly waiting within me all along.

When I was younger, I believed that having everyone and everything by my side was the key to happiness. I thought life could be made beautiful simply by inviting more people into it.

So, I tried to get close even to those who were very different from me. I was so afraid of losing people that even when someone treated me rudely or criticized my actions, I would smile.

I thought that if I spoke honestly about what hurt me, they might leave. I believed that love and happiness depended on how many people stayed in my life.

But much of that "happiness" existed only in my mind.

I became desperate for affection. I would do silly things just to get noticed, hoping someone would want to be close to me.

I remember one incident clearly: it was a friend’s birthday. I wrote her a heartfelt letter, pouring my soul into the words, and gave it to her with a gift.

She opened the present but didn’t even glance at the letter. She left it aside, unread.

That moment made me feel completely unwanted. It felt like my feelings were worthless. She cared about the material gift, not the emotions behind it. That experience opened my eyes: in today’s world, material things are often what people notice first.

I learned that when we do things for others expecting the same in return, we risk undervaluing ourselves.

But when we do those same things for ourselves, the outcome is different. We create joy because we are finally honoring our own needs.

"I spent years waiting for others to give me the love I wasn't giving myself. I thought if I was just 'kind' enough, they would finally love me back.

But I realized that expectations are a silent trap. When we give love just to get it back, we aren't being kind; we are just waiting. Eventually, the weight of those unmet expectations turns into disappointment.

"The burden of waiting to be noticed becomes much heavier than the joy of being loved."

"Whenever I felt sad, I’d reach for the person closest to me. Sometimes they were there, but only when they were free.

As time passed, everyone grew busy chasing their own goals. That’s when reality hit me: no one can stay with you forever. There will be days when you must face your anxieties alone. The hardest truth is this: the dependence we place on others prevents us from living fully.

We forget ourselves while trying to keep others. Not being true to yourself is the saddest part of life.

Don't chase paths.

Let paths follow you.

Let everybody chase you.

Just love and value yourself.

And watch everything fall into place...

Now, I understand. We search for love outside, believing someone else will "complete" us.

But love does not begin out there. It begins from within. The love I was waiting for from others was the love I needed to give myself first.

Choosing yourself isn't about closing your heart to the world; it’s about finally opening it to the person who has been standing by you since day one: you.

When you stop waiting for the world to tell you that you’re enough, you reclaim a power that no one can take away.

By making yourself the priority, you aren't being selfish; you are being honest.

You are building a foundation of confidence that doesn't shake when someone forgets to text back or fails to see your worth.

When you love yourself exactly as you wish to be loved—tenderly and without compromise—you stop being a beggar for attention and start being the architect of your own joy.

You’ll find that when you value your own light, the right people don't just notice it; they are drawn to it.

"So keep yourself first, always. If you hand your worth to others, you may never receive the love you truly deserve. So, darling, cherish yourself: love yourself exactly as you wish to be loved—tenderly, fully, without compromise."