I DON'T CARE...….!

I Don't care…………..

I don’t care what you do, I don't care how you do it- it’s your job and you have to do it anyway, no matter what.

Whenever you hear such statements from your partner -directly or indirectly -it breaks you.it feels like you're just a thing, not a person. Especially when you are financially dependent on him, it hurts even more. It doesn't matter how much you do- taking care of kids, cooking for everyone, cleaning the house, managing all the chores without even asking much-it's all taken for granted.

Sad but true, Sad but true, this is the reality for many women. Even financially independent women sometimes face similar treatment after marriage. They are still treated like outsiders in their own homes. From time to time, they hear negative comments that chip away at their confidence.

When a child makes a mistake, they say, “He’s just like his mother.” But when the child does something good, they proudly say, “He’s like his father.” At that moment, they forget who spends most of the time with the child, who teaches them values, manners, and love. Why is that? Why do they behave in ways that hurt women so deeply?

In India, people say that girls are a form of Goddess Lakshmi. They welcome her warmly after marriage — but after a year or so, Lakshmi becomes more like a BAI( maid). No matter what she does, no matter that she left her own family behind, she’s still not valued as she should be.

I always saw that the woman of the house would finish all the household chores — cooking, dusting, helping the kids with their studies, and much more. Meanwhile, the man, who had his own business and mostly worked from home, barely had to lift a finger. He would come home and simply give orders — asking for tea, lunch, or whatever he needed.

Even when she wasn’t feeling well, she still had to do everything he said. I remember once asking my grandmother, “Why doesn’t he do his own work — like washing his clothes, getting himself a glass of water, or helping feed the kids when she’s unwell?”

And the answer was always the same:

“After marriage, every girl has to make compromises — it’s her duty, not his.”

That moment stayed with me. Because it wasn’t just about one man or one woman — it was about a mindset passed down through generations. A belief that women are born to serve, to sacrifice, and to silently bear it all. And the worst part? It’s so normalized that no one even questions it anymore.

But let’s be honest — this mindset, this conditioning, isn’t built by men alone. Many women themselves pass it on.

Mothers often raise their sons with a dangerous sense of entitlement. They don’t teach them that just because they are boys, it doesn’t mean the household responsibilities will magically become someone else’s burden. They grow up believing that their only job is to earn — and everything else, from cooking to cleaning to raising children — will be “handled” by their future wife or sister.

But here’s the truth that gets conveniently ignored:

When one partner works outside, the other works just as hard inside.

It’s not “easy” to stay at home — it’s just invisible. The cooking, the cleaning, the managing of kids, the emotional labor — it’s all unpaid, unacknowledged, and often unappreciated. But it’s work. Real, exhausting, never-ending work.

If boys were raised with the same sense of responsibility and empathy as girls, maybe things would be different. Maybe wives wouldn’t be expected to serve husbands. Maybe daughters wouldn’t be taught to “adjust.” Maybe homes would become partnerships, not power dynamics.

Because equality doesn't start in offices or laws — it starts at home, in how we raise our sons and value our daughters.

Until then, we’re not building families — we’re building hierarchies disguised as homes.